i have another personal blog but i’m keeping it private, for now at least.
and there’s my other blog, dankcouture.tumblr.com.
but i’ve been too sick to care about updating it.
in severe pain because of endometriosis and polycystic ovarian disease.
alone on this stupid fucking holiday.
hope your NYE is better than mine.
this blog is officially closed.
not enjoying today.
to plan for change.
I need to
• organize my ridiculous amount of clothes
• read (want to start reading game of thrones, since I freaking loved the first season.)
• get a full time gig once the year starts.
• hoping instead of moping.
• drink. it’s the holidays.
• meriwether show Saturday night.
• order marsh’s presents.
• go to the mall and get his other presents.
• specialist in Houston December 28th.
• feel pretty again. I haven’t since like, October.
• get yoga pants.
• focus on my wardrobe / self etc.
it’d almost be kind of cool if i could work at wet seal or something. even though it’d probably suck, I know they get ballin discounts and clothes and shoes make me happy.
i just need money man. independence. confidence. i lost it somewhere. I’ve felt ugly for what feels like a long time.
i wish i could take adderall so id always be doing shit, then i wouldn’t be sad because I would be too busy.
but I am overly determined to do this without medication. it hurt me more than it helped.
next two days straight with my boyfriend. he’s been working what feels like all the time lately. i won’t ruin it. i will try to be happy. i will try to enjoy myself. i will TRY.